Listening is Life Saving

BY MELODY MACDONALD

Dispatcher: 9-1-1, what is the address of your emergency?

Caller provides address.

Dispatcher: What’s going on there?

Caller: Um, I-I don’t want to say. I’m going to kill myself, but I’d rather have you guys find me first before my parents.

Dispatcher: Okay. Let’s start with your name so we know who you are.

Caller provides name and continues: . . . Front door is unlocked so they don’t have to barge in.

Dispatcher: Why are you doing this?

Caller: Don’t go through the backyard because of the dogs. I’ll be on the second floor. The door will be open. {voice is rattling}

Dispatcher: What is your intended method?

Caller: I have a 357 magnum.

Dispatcher: Where is the gun?

Caller: In my hand. I have it cocked back.

Dispatcher: Can you put the gun down?

Caller: I’d rather not.

Dispatcher: Well, why? What’s going on today?

Caller: It’s been hard. {tearful voice}

Dispatcher: Sounds like life has been rough for you recently, yeah?

Caller: Yeah, I guess so.

Dispatcher collects date of birth: So, you’re 17? A senior in high school?

Caller: Yes.

Dispatcher: My name is Melody, and I have a 17-year-old son in high school. I can relate to what 17-year-olds are going through from a parent’s perspective. Will you talk to me today? I’m listening.

My morning started rather normal. I had just received word that we had a dispatcher call in sick and the on-call dispatcher was also sick. We were working short-staffed prior to the sick call and had already shuffled the work to the remaining dispatchers on the floor, stretching them painfully thin. I had a full day of scheduling ahead of me as I was on a strict timeline to get mandatory overtime sign-ups filled. But it was my turn to deploy to the dispatch floor, something the three of us supervisors rotated nearly daily.

I had been assigned the backup fire radio channel position which required me to support the primary dispatcher when needed but mostly it was to answer as many phones as possible. No problem. That was my favorite working position at 9-1-1, interacting with the community.

About an hour into my shift, I picked up a ringing 9-1-1 call. This one. I’ve taken calls like this one many times in my 20+ year career. Most often though, it’s a family member calling to report a loved one who is suicidal, or they have discovered their loved one dead. The latter is highly traumatic for the family member calling in, and is often the most difficult to send aid to because the emotional damage is happening in rapid succession. Here are three ways:

1.    Seeing their loved one;

2.    Calling 9-1-1;

3.    Hearing the sirens approaching.

For the family member, the nightmare is now a reality but it’s not sinking in until they hear our voice. If they weren’t screaming upon answering (usually they are) they definitely start at this point. This makes the call difficult to process because, for good reason, they are in crisis.

It is my job to confirm an address as soon as possible. The time clock starts the moment I answer the phone. I have 30 seconds to figure out what’s going on and where it’s happening then get the call to the Dispatcher. The Dispatcher has 30 seconds to dispatch the call. It’s amazing what can be gathered in 30 seconds and what cannot be gathered in a minute. It comes down to listening.

Active Listening requires the listener to “listen attentively to a speaker, understand what they’re saying, respond and reflect on what’s being said, and retain the information for later. This keeps both the listener and speaker actively engaged in the conversation.” (Center for Creative Leadership)

In 9-1-1, Active Listening also requires the call-taker to believe the caller. We are not to question the validity of their concern/complaint. It is their truth. We are to ask questions accordingly.

Where listening can get tricky in 9-1-1 is when a call-taker/Dispatcher becomes complacent. Often, similar calls that sound emergent, like a suicidal subject, end with no action—they are treated as a false alarm. Dispatchers are not often privy to outcomes. We have to seek it out by calling the Police Sergeant or Fire Captain or Ambulance Supervisor after the fact to learn the outcome. Common outcomes include learning that the caller was a habitual caller or the officer provided the caller and/or family members information on mental health and cleared the call. There are numerous outcomes, but to the call-taker who did their job in believing the validity of the caller now begins to question their listening and questioning tactics. Did they respond correctly? There should be no change in call-taking, but we are human and tend to want to get it right and to not waste resources (which isn’t a call-takers problem, by the way).

On this day, I believed him. I doubted he actually had a loaded gun cocked in his hand. But he said it, so I documented it, and I believed him. Thankfully, our 17-minute phone call ended with him walking out of his house with me on the phone and into the hands of responding officers. I was able to deliver him safe. Thank you, God. The officers called me later to let me know they found a loaded and cocked 357 magnum gun on the bed, right where I asked him to leave it.

I listened. He listened. Together we saved a life that day. Literally.

Listening is something to behold in everyone’s lives. It really makes a difference to be heard and to be seen. Jesus listened to the woman at the well. She needed to be seen. Isn’t that what we all want, to be seen and to be heard?

In my 20+ year career in 9-1-1, Active Listening has taught me that everyone has a story worth hearing. The neighbor feeling defeated with a property line dispute. The victim of a car break-in that changed the trajectory of their day. The homeless person cold and weary wanting a bed for the night by way of an ambulance for a minor ailment. The family who is concerned about their overdue surfer. The mom unable to locate their child who, thankfully, was hiding in the closet too long and fell asleep unaware of mom’s panicky calls.

I’m thankful I said yes to this career. I prayed that Jesus would be present through me in my career. That those on the other end of the phone would feel Him in some way. And that those I worked with side by side and over the radio would see my joy and wonder where it came from. Some knew. Some were also believers. Some were curious. Through it all, I was always me. Maybe a little more tarnished than when I started, but still joyful, kind, and compassionate.

MELODY MACDONALD

Melody MacDonald, is a retired 9-1-1 Operations Supervisor turned full-time family photographer. Based in Santa Cruz, CA, her husband (a Fire District Battalion Chief) and Melody raised two sons who are now thriving adults. They love traveling with their two chocolate labs, camping, hunting, fishing, walking, pickleball, and staying connected with their kids, family and friends.

You can find Melody's photography work at www.odymacphoto.com and on Instagram @odymacphoto.